went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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