The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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