I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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