oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
