OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
