We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Randomize
