She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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