Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
