Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Randomize
