Fine. I'll sleep in my office
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we still banned from the library?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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