i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
