At least make sure they are 18
Why
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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