you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
