Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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