I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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