Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize