I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
