You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
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He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
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My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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