you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize