A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
i out mim tonsoeep
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
