2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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