The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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