what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
