Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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