; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
