there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
