My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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