I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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