So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize