fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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