Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
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