I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
