went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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