may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
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