he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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