And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
