She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize