The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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