He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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