the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
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Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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