he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize