i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
This baby is an asshole
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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