i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Ketchup is God's man juice
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
