I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize