I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
