I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
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