Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Success! We fucked roommates!
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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