and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
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