Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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