whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
